Geek In the Pink

UGH these last couple of weeks have been awful. Truely

Exams = fail.

Essays = epic fail.

I found out that I was only going to get around 80% grade in Psych, and I freaked. I tanked the essay apparently, and also the exam, and I found out at the end of my Art exam. I literally burst into tears. I had a seriously EMO day after that, so upset about the fact that I definatly would never get into Oxford. My mother also got very upset and told me if I got less than 80% there was no point in being in the school, I was never going to get into University. I was so upset, I believed her. All day I freaked out about not going to University. Not fun. I was being really emo about it, about how my life was over, I wouldn't even graduate high school, etc etc. I was even planning on getting really really drunk that night, even though I hate the taste of alchohol. I had a crazy mentality of "Girls who don't go to University get really drunk on the weekends right?"

Then, I was saved. Because a couple of hours before I went out, I got a facebook message from my cousin. She has a friend in the admissions office at Trinity.... apparently, for a US applicant you need to get 1300 on the SATS.

I got 1600.

I'M IN TO TRINITY!!!!!

Well, not exactly. I have to apply and stuff. BUT WOOHOO, I got the points for Trinity! I AM GOING TO UNIVERSITY. Needless to say, I did not go out and get plastered that night. Infact, despite how upset I was at the time, I look back and laugh at how rediculous I was acting.

BUT last night, I was discovered being rather silly. Well. Stupid. My mother found a packet of ciggarettes in my bag. I feel more angry at the bag than my sister, who left the bag open in the living room. In fact, I'm not really angry at her at all. Its not her fault, I left them in there. I'm not sure why I feel the bag betrayed me o.O Maybe I felt that the bag was so cool, it could never be involved with anything bad. Its a DeathNote bag, I love it. Besides the point

I was actually giving them up. I don't find it difficult, I'm not addicted to them. I know everyone says that, but I dont smoke often enough to concider myself a "smoker" nor often enough to be addicted. Though I should really say "didn't". I'm actually in some ways glad they found out. Now I have an out. I wanted to stop for ages I just never did. Now I have a solid reason to. Though lung cancer really should have been a good enough reason, but no one ever said I was good with logic.

*sigh* I'm really quite ashamed with myself in the first place. I don't LIKE smoking anymore. I used to, the actual inhaling that a lot of people hate. I always felt dizzy after, and I always needed to stay sitting and drink something, but I didnt really care. But I couldn't have anything stronger than a Lucky Strike because I would feel sick instantly. And, I am just as aware as the next person that it was awful for me, and a stupid waste of money, and it smelt bad, and a waste of time getting outside and smoking it and then coming back inside and half the time the lighter doesnt work... etc

The only reason I still had them was because I was gonna sell them next semester *facepalm* it sounds stupid but one can get a decent profit from a half a pack of ciggarettes from desperate people on the school bus. But I suppose I might have ended up smoking them so its all for the best.

Well, congrats Neevy, you are an idiot!

OH OH OH. For mah birthday, I was very lucky. I gotted season 2 of Torchwood, YAY, plenty of Jack/Ianto action coming my way, and I also FINALLY got World of Warcraft YAY!

Actually, no. Not YAY. BECAUSE I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO PLAY YET!

I tried to use my old user name, and it said I needed to convert to a battle.net accout, where it told me my username was incorrect, so I tried to get a new username, but I kept being sent to battle.net, and eventually I tried to input my game, BUT IT SAID MY CODE WAS INVALID, WHICH IT WASN'T! It took me two days just to install the game, then a day of these problems, now 2 days waiting for an email back from these people! ITS BEEN A FULL WORKING WEEK, AND I STILL HAVEN'T PLAYED MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT!!!

*takes deep breaths* *calms*

Not cool. At all.